There is a woman who jogs every morning; no matter the weather. She really, really bugs me. It’s not that she is in amazing shape or anything. In fact I have no idea what kind of shape she is in because she is always in big baggy clothes. (She even has this one flowy top that looks like she ran into a butterfly. The wings wrap around the front of her and tie in the back. It appears she does not even have a bra on.) Mostly she annoys me because as I drive past her I swear I can hear her puff out, “no excuses.”
Lady, I will run you over. Don’t tell me when and how to excericise….YOU!
This poor lady has no idea of my disdain for her.
One particularly cold day Caren had invited me to walk the 3 mile loop with her and a friend. I really did not want to because no amount of good company was going to keep the bitter cold wind from stabbing through my clothes.
I have not worked out since before the Holidays….nah…I’m not going.
I was having this conversation with myself as I was driving back from the school. And then, there she was. Bundled from head to toe was that Crazy Mountain Jogger.
“No excuses,” her dedication told me.
“Shut up! You don’t know me!” I shouted at her as I drove by. Then I rolled down my window and chuncked an empty water bottle at her. I laughed with satisfaction as it bounced off of her hooded head.
OK. That didn’t really happen but that’s what I imagined and the picture alone brought a smug smile to my face.
Yeah. You don’t know me, I thought again to myself.
“No excuses,” she said again as I watched her fade in my rear view mirror.
Darn you Crazy Mountain Jogger!!!
I called Caren and we went for our walk. And the bitter wind did stab through my clothes and slapped my face for the ugliness in my heart toward the Crazy Mountain Jogger. It only made me dispise her more…
Last night, while I was at chorale practice, it began to snow. We were only supposed to get about an inch but we ended up with about 5 inches and it’s still snowing. Anywhoo, you know my anxiety for driving in the snow and now I was going to have to face that fear at night. Geez Criminy.
I scraped the ice off of my windshield and mounted my trusty SNOW TIRES. (Man still gets mad when I mention them but he doesn’t read my blogs so, snow tires, snow tires, snow tires!) The car felt self propelled. I kept it in low gear to temper it’s need for speed. I white knuckled it the whole way home and my 30 min. drive became 45. Still, I got home safe and with not a single slip. Yea!
This morning Man took my car, i.e. my snow tires. Caren called and said that it would be best if I did not drive. One of our neighbors already had an issue with getting up our hill. She offered to take The Bug’s science fair project to the school for me, as she was going to be up there anyway.
So this, the 101st day of school, went like all of our other mornings (crappy) and I walked down to the bus stop with a tri-fold board and two little boys. One with snow pants, snow shoes but no jacket and the other with a jacket and snow shoes but no snow pants. Grrrrr.
We slipped our way down to the bus stop. Let me tell you, there was wailing and gnashing of teeth; mostly by the one who forgot his coat. Caren and I loaded the kids on the bus and had a quick chat. She was headed down the hill to meet with her trainer. I tried to convince her of the folly of this and to return to my home for some coffee. She seemed to pause briefly but then she got in her car and promised to join me for coffee after her work out.
I turned my boots up hill and began the slippery trudge back to the house. As I did the Crazy Mountain Woman ran through my head.
“No excuses,” she goaded.
Whatever, lady. I’m going home. I’m going to build a fire, start a pot of coffe and snuggle with my dog on the couch that he’s not supposed to be on. No excuses.